natashavc:

I hope this picture of JH and his horsecock makes you feel bad. For every underemployed, chinless, checkered shirt/chucks, bowl sparkin’, asshole who blogs about his epic whiskey intake, updates his twitter, and gets a greazy boner for every spread of Natalie Portman /Zooey Deez lookin supine in a pictorial for W magazine and then feels compelled to erect a digital monument to the 30 second tightening of their nutsack, I hope the lusty projections of women about the supposed but undetermined ‘CHILL ATTITUDE’ of this man  (because that’s what Natty P and Zo-Zo must be like right? Just dope bitches who wanna spoon and fuck on a pile of pizza! Pizza! Who needs a table with cloth when you have a girl that loves you with or without a boxspring?) and their heartfelt, unbreakable vow to bust their jaws for a crack at that dick makes you feel small.